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Bolt-Down Speed Bumps

Posted in Driving Basics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 27, 2011 by HackingVegas

I’ve written a few crazy stories but there are  some things that I just don’t know how to describe. So I take pictures to show these things to people. For some reason I’ve decided to try and describe this latest mishap. Don’t worry…. I have a picture to show at the end, just in case. It starts as I am driving through the underground taxi staging area at a hotel. I turn the corner and start to head out to the strip. I look to my left where the valet pulls up and see a car flying up the ramp not stopping. I slam on my brakes  and stop quick, thanks to the help of the bolt-down speed bumps a lot of the hotels are starting to use.   After the valet pulled through, I hit the gas but didn’t move for a second. Then the car jerked forward and I smelled rubber burning. I’m no mechanic but I know that’s not good so I stop. I get out and look but don’t see anything. So I try it again. The car jerks forward and stops and so do I. I get back out and then I see it. The bolt down speed bump found a way to fold in half and wedge itself up into my cars undercarriage. So I call my supervisor and wait to have them move the car because lord knows I’m not going to be able to explain this and I don’t want to be blamed for anything. Luckily everything was fine but this is just another example of the crazy things that I deal with that most others never will.

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Who’s Amy

Posted in Driving Basics, Drunks with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 6, 2011 by HackingVegas

 

The other day I got a call to pick up from a local hospital ER. We get these all the time and most are just people feeling like crap after a night of too many drinks and drugs. But this one was a little different.

I pulled up and a man and woman came out and got in. They were headed to a hotel about 5 miles away and little did I know it would be a long awkward drive. After I asked where they were going, it was quiet for about a minute. Then she spoke ~

Her: I had your phone while you were passed out.

Him: oh, ah, ok…. thanks

Her: Who’s Amy?

Him: eeehhhh…… A friend from home.

Her: Why is she asking if I’m asleep?

Him: ……… I don’t know…. Why did you read my messages?

Not only did she read his text messages, but she had been texting Amy nonstop over the previous two hours. Come to find out, Amy had planned a trip to Vegas before he made plans to come with his new girl. So now his new girl is probing into who Amy really was to him while sitting in the back of my cab. By the sound of her voice and the way she asked certain questions, she already knew every answer prior to asking the question. Amy was his ex-fiancé. The reason they broke it off was because he had done this same thing to her.

The 12 min ride consisted of her asking questions, him not really answering them and then her answering the questions for him. The two girls actually ended up exchanging numbers and were planing to have lunch before they left. The guy was dumbfounded.

I pulled up to the hotel and opened their doors. She got out and started into the hotel. As he got out he asked her to wait for him. She turned her head as she kept walking and said the best thing ever.

“Why should I wait? You’re not getting back in the room. It’s in my name and I’ll have the bell desk take your bags. Good bye”

 

Vegas and Relationships

Posted in Crazy Families, Driving Basics, Hookers, Random Info with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 27, 2011 by HackingVegas

One thing Vegas can do is destroy a relationship. I see and hear it almost everyday in the back of my cab. I decided to share one story with you today because it was truly a first for me. Vegas is known for its sex, drugs and gambling but some people don’t know how to control themselves.

I see and hear many guys and gals cheating on their significant others. But most of the time it’s the guys bragging to their buddies and gals crying because “that’s not the type of person they are”. But this time it was a wife and her husband in my cab. He wasn’t talking about cheating and technically she wasn’t either, well not yet at least. What she was saying though was not what I typically hear.

Her: So honey, have you heard that Vegas has male escorts?

Him: No, I knew about the female ones but never the male.

Her: I was talking it over with the girls and we decided we need to have some fun while we are out here.

Him: What are you getting at?

Her: Well we were thinking to mix things up the three of us would get ourselves escorts tomorrow and if you guys wanted you can do the same.

Him: Um….. OK….. aahhh…. well….

Her: It’s going to be fun. Everyone in Vegas does it. Just go with it, you’ll see

Him: um…. I guess. I don’t know what you’re trying to do but if that’s what you want then I guess.  Besides, it sounds like you have your mind made up.

As I pulled up to let them out they continued to talk about it. The last thing I heard was…

Her: You know I love you but…….

This is just another example of what Vegas really isn’t about.  My wife and I started our life together out here. While I know we are not the “norm”, we like to think that Vegas is really what you make of it.

“What Happens In Vegas Moves To Vegas”

Fighting For His M.I.L.F.

Posted in Driving Basics, Drunks with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 22, 2011 by HackingVegas

Security came out with a guy and loaded my next fare. While they were bringing him out he’s yelling, “I just want to fuck that M.I.L.F”. So with that said, here is the fare’s side of the story.

He gets in all pissed off until I ask him, “what the hell did they do to you?”. I had him at that point. He started bragging about everything.

His story:

So I’ve been coming to this hotel for years now and they’ve always taken care of me. For some reason this trip they decided that I was out of line. For what? I don’t know, but I think they’re jealous of my skills with the ladies. I think they are pissed that I was taking all the ladies from the other guests. All weekend I had them hanging on me and wanting to get in my pants. I mean, this is nothing new while I’m here. They should know this. But this week I guess I pissed them off with my newest fan.

The hottest cocktail waitress in the hotel wanted me. I guess she was one of the “big guys” girls but she couldn’t help herself. She brought me drink after drink and came to me more than most waitresses do. She wanted me so bad everyone could see it. So I was sitting at the machine when I decided to make my move. She leaned over me to set my drink down and made sure her tits were right there. I mean, come on. She was asking me to do it. So I turned my chair, wrapped my arms around her and put my face firmly between them. She was acting like she didn’t want me there, but I knew it was just a show for her boss. I told her, “it’s ok, I’ll fuck you”.

Next thing I know I was being taken to the ground by security and thrown out. I tried to explain what she was doing and they didn’t want to hear it. They were just jealous that I was going to score. As they ware walking me out they told me that I was no longer welcome at that hotel and that if I came back I would go to jail. I was pissed. All I wanted was that M.I.L.F. and they couldn’t handle it.

So, when he was done with his little story he asked me if I understood. Could I believe that they would do that crap? I could only say, “here’s your airline”. As I unloaded his bag, he paid me and I completed my talk with, “you fuckin ass wipe. It’s her job. You’re an old man and I doubt your wife even wants you”. Yes he was wearing his wedding ring. I then got in the car before he could say anything back and drove off.

Vegas brings the best out in people.

Do You Listen Before Talking (WTF 4)

Posted in Driving Basics, Law Enforcement, Random Info with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 20, 2011 by HackingVegas

After hanging up on the Taxi Authority in (WTF 3) I went to the coordinator’s office to see what they could or could not give me. Just like before, they knew nothing and couldn’t help me. I then tried to talk to a manager about this. This use to be easy. They use to have their own building and we could just go over there and talk to them. Now they have been moved into the office next to the coordinators office. The door that leads to the new office is behind the desks and has a sign that says something to the effect of “don’t enter without supervisor”. Well, that would be nice if I could get one to act like I’m there.  After trying to get someone to help me and having no luck, I just walked out.  I then walked next door to our human resources office and gave them a shout.

After I filled in the lady at the desk with what is going on, I then asked if she could help me.  I let her know that I was wanting the cops to see the video and was trying to get the information that dispatch had written down for me while I was driving.  She tried to refer me to the same people who blew me off and only cared about the car. She then gave me a number to a guy that will help me in getting the cops to see the video. So I thanked her and walked out to call this guy.

Feeling better because I felt someone was really trying to help, I called the number and got a lady. She says that the guy I was needing to talk to was gone for the day and that she will pass all of my information to him in the morning. He’d get back to me. She said that he works from about 5am to 3pm and before hanging up, she wanted to look to see if the video had uploaded yet. She couldn’t find it but said he uploads them all in the morning and he’ll see it.  I thanked her for helping and hung up. Things were looking up.

I move on to dispatch. I called up and asked to talk to a supervisor. That itself was not an easy task. First I’m told that there isn’t one up there. Then I’m told I’m not allowed to talk to them but that they would take a message and pass it along.  So I call my supervisor and explain who I’m trying to talk to.  Finally after three calls I get transferred to the Dispatch Supervisor.  When he picks up I explain what I’m needing and ask if I can come up and copy it down or if he can read it off to me. For some reason he goes on to let me know that I need to hit my panic button and that will alert my dispatcher that I need help. he goes on to say that I can’t just call for help and I need to follow company policy.

First I told that this had happened about 3 hours prior. So why is he telling me to hit my panic button and deal with my dispatcher? Next, I would hope the guy “supervising” the Dispatchers would know what the radios can and can’t do.  You see a few months ago all of our radios were changed in our cabs and dispatch. Our old radios use to let dispatch know if we hit our panic button.  These new ones don’t. They don’t even tell the dispatch who’s talking to them. Finally, I go back and repeat that this happened 3 HOURS AGO!

I then return to trying to explain to him that I don’t need anyone to help me but him. I ask him again if I can get the information I gave the dispatcher so I can fill out a police report. He proceeded to rant on how everything in dispatch is company property. He explains that if I needed anything I would have to set up a meeting with the CEO of the company. Then, and only then, am I allowed to get anything from dispatch. He then went on to tell me that I better not even think about asking for any video. Those are private property and no one sees those. If I want the cops to see them then I better hope they get a warrant to view them.

So as I’m sure you can figure out I’M PISSED! I asked the guy, ” So if I want to get the information that I provided to my dispatcher regarding an assault that happened against me, I have to set up a meeting with the CEO of the company?  Which means I take time off work and hope that  he allows me to get this info, so then I can go to the police and file a report?” I was seeing red and couldn’t believe the stupidity I was hearing. He had a simple answer for me, YES. I couldn’t take anymore and just hung up.

I have felt helpless as a cabbie before but this was beyond anything I had experienced.  I got into my car and sat there for a few minutes trying to process what had just happened.  This was a company I thought was a good place to work. A company that advertises to have the happiest employees. I’m sure those “happy” employees haven’t had to deal with this stupidity.  I drove home and thought about this all. My only hope was the guy that should be calling me in the morning.

The next day came and went. I never got a call and when I called up to talk to him (4 times), I was told that he was unavailable.  I was all alone in this again. I had to think about what to do. Should I cause a huge uproar at work about this? No, that would just get me fired. Been there, done that. Do I go file a police report without the information I need? No, that’s pointless. So to wrap it all up I just decided to listen to the wife and let it go. I know I’ll get nowhere and if I try to make a deal about it, then I’ll more than likely get fired. Instead, I’m bitching to you guys and moving on hoping someday there will be change.

Thanks for putting up with this. You can look forward to a true Vegas Cab story coming up next time

The Cab Flood of 2011

Posted in Driving Basics, Drunks with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 9, 2011 by HackingVegas

For my twitter follower’s you were there with me when “The Cab Flood of 2011” took place. But now comes the full story.

When I started driving I never knew I would come across the people I have over the years. For example this “crappy” post. That was a new one for me. I use to work in the medical field and my patients had more self-respect than some of my fares. The Fare that was involved in ” The Cab Flood of 2011″ seemed to be an ok guy at first. Oh how looks deceive.

I pick this guy up  from The Cosmopolitan Hotel. He was drunker than a skunk but was able to hold a conversation. The doorman acted as if he knows the guy saying that he knows he good for it, “I see you all the time”. Come to find out this guy is affiliated with The Excalibur Hotel in some form. (I pray as a contractor and not an employee) We talk about the visitors that are in town at the time and how we are looking forward to some of the groups that are coming up.

I take him to his apartment where he pays the fare. I get out to grab his door like I do everyone and he gets out. As he is walking away I notice his ass is wet. Well that’s not uncommon seeing that the pools all just started to open.  I look at the seat and see that it’s wet too and hope that with the heat of the day it will dry before I get to my next fare. This is Standard Operating Procedure for us. Even if it’s still wet we can ask for a single rider until it’s dry. So off I go to my next fare.

I got about a mile down the road when it hit me. I smell something off. I can’t put my finger on it but it doesn’t smell right. I pull to the next light and lean-to the back seat. I take a big sniff and that was all she wrote.  I nearly fell out my cab and walked back to the yard. But I sucked it up, Whined on Twitter and took this Pic.

It’s PEEEEEEE!!! I roll down all four window and crank the A/C. That wasn’t enough so I hung my head out the window.  It was odd. I went about a mile before I smelt it but now that I had I couldn’t smell anything else. I race back to the yard to get a new cab and have them clean the seat.

When I got my cab back they had cleaned the whole cab and even left me an air freshener.  I love our detail show.

Rub and Tug

Posted in Driving Basics, Drunks, Hookers, Random Info with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 6, 2011 by HackingVegas

Las Vegas is known for a lot of things but most of all it’s known as “SIN CITY”. This is a very fitting name considering that you can do nearly anything you can dream of and then some.  As a driver in Vegas we are involved in the transportation of the visitors looking for the Sin part of our city and therefore we are also used for information gathering.  It’s common to get a fare who doesn’t know where they are going until they give you the third degree.  This was the case the other day.

It was just after sunrise and I was sitting at one of my favorite morning hotels hoping for a fare to the Airport.  Out of no where I have a man knocking on my window asking to get in. I notice he doesn’t have the luggage I was hoping for but such is luck. I unlock the doors and off we go. As I pull off I ask where he’s going and that’s where it all starts.

Him: I need a rub down. Where is the best place?

Me: Well are you looking for a good rub down or a GOOD RUB DOWN (Hinting about a parlor)

He then starts in with this long-winded story about how he has been up for about 24 hours and playing cards and just needs to relax. That he has an extra $500 and he’s just trusting me to take him somewhere that will help.

Here’s the problem with that, I’m not the type of driver who will just drive you somewhere if I’m not sure that’s where you want to go. Between the complaints I’ve got from other fares about other drivers doing that and the fact if the guy gets pissed I can get in trouble from the T.A. for not getting a proper destination.

So I pull to the side and start playing 20 questions.  I start with,

This is what a "Real Spa" for massages looks like

Me: are you wanting a true Spa where they are legit and give really good message’s or are you looking for a rub and tug?

Him: Well I’m sore and need relief

Me: Ok well then I would wait for the spa to open at your hotel and go there. With the money you have they will take care of you.

Him: But I need it now. I don’t want to wait. Don’t they have those Asian places you can take me?

This is what a "Rub&Tug" place looks like

I go on to explain that those are really just there for the rub and tug. If he’s really sore they wont be able to help him. Most guys I pick up from those places say the girls hurt them and most say they stop the girl and get to the point.

By now I know that all he really wants it a rub and tug and I’m done playing games.  I turn in my seat and say,

Me: OK let’s stop the shit. You are looking for a hooker and didn’t find one at the hotel you were at. So you jump in my cab and don’t have the balls to say so and spend ten minutes beating around the bush. Now it’s coming up to the time I have to go pick up a personal fare and I need you to figure out what you want or get out. If you want a true message get out and make an appointment at the hotel. If you are looking for a hooker I’ll take you to one of the brothels and you can have at. If you are just looking for someone to pay attention to you and have her tug on you then say so. I don’t have this kind of time. We are in Vegas and I’m a Cabbie. You’re a grown man and I’ve heard it all before so be a man and stop wasting my time.

Him: (in a beaten voice) well, um, just….. (I’m about to kick him out) aaahhhh take me to one of those asian places. Just go to the best one.

I tell him they are all the same but I’m taking him to the one on the way to where my next pick up is. If he needed a ride back he could call me when he’s done and I could pick him back up in about 45 mins. My phone never rang and my day went on.

So for any readers that are coming to Vegas and feel embarrassed about wanting to do something, I have this to say.

If you are afraid to ask for it than maybe you shouldn’t be doing it.  If you want something ask for it and don’t waste everyone’s time. This is Vegas and you know… What Happens in Vegas Stays Dorment Until You Get Home And Need “That Cream”.

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