Archive for Business

Facebook For President

Posted in Driving Basics, Hookers, Random Info with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 30, 2012 by HackingVegas

When your job is to be on the roads of Las Vegas for up to 12 hours a day, you see a lot of crazy shit.  I’ve seen a lot over the years and every once in a while I’m able to snap a picture. I wish I had a camera open and ready to shoot in seconds but the sad reality is that I can only get a few.  I’ve run across the TV show COPS filming a hooker being arrested….

and seen a woman dressed in all black from head to toe as she turned heads in the middle of summer walking the streets in 110 degree temperatures.

But the one that thing that has stood out the  most, is this guy

Why did he stand out you may ask?

I see him almost everyday. I don’t only see him on The Strip. I’ve seen him as far off The Strip as as about 15 miles off, in the residential parts of town.

It’s not his hat or the flag he has stuck in it that caught my attention. No, it was his shirt

Yes, acording to this guy Facebook is the President of the world.  Everyday it’s the same clothes, hat and flag. The only thing that ever changes on this guy is some of his accessories.

Not too long ago, I finally had a chance to try to talk with him. I was on a charter and while parked outside of a store he walked by. I honked my horn and waved him over. He stopped and looked at me with a worried look on his face. I’m sure he as good reason to be worried because I’m sure many people just give him crap and make fun of him. So to try and earn his trust I held out a bottle of water and a bag of craisens (that’s all I had left in my lunch). He stopped and walked over and in a strong accent he said, “thank you” as he grabbed them. I asked if I could talk to him for a minute. I explained that I had seen him all over town and was wanting to ask a few questions so I had answers for my customers who asked about him.

He said, “no understand, no no no”. He turned and ran with his flag tucked under his arm, waterbottle and craisens in one hand and waving to me with the other.

So I have a new mission. Yes, I will not be happy until I can get this guy to talk to me. Even if it’s a broken English conversation, I won’t be happy until its done. I’m good at communicating in broken English so wish me luck. If I run into him again I’ll be sure to update you all.

I Love Award Shows

Posted in Driving Basics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 20, 2012 by HackingVegas

I picked up a lady headed to church. She says she nearly 80 years old and this is her first time out of her home state of Iowa. I ask how she decided Las Vegas for her first trip? She says it was where her sister wanted to go for her 85th birthday. The small chat continues for a while then she asks the big question…

I asked my bellman what the AVN is I keep hearing about. He told me he didn’t know but to make sure and ask my next cabbie because you guys know everything. So what is it?

For those of you who don’t know but want to know more than I’m going to tell you, go ahead and click HERE for a safe link to Wikipedia that will fill you in.

Not knowing what to say to this 80-year-old on her way to church I simply said, it’s an award show they do in Las Vegas every year. Little did I know she LOVED award shows. She Started in on 20 questions.

What kind of award show is it?
Well, its like the Oscars but not….

Do you think I would still be able to buy tickets?
Um… I don’t know. But I don’t think you would want to go.

Why? I love award shows. I would love to see stars walking the red carpet.
Well Ma’am these are not the stars you’re thinking of. This award show is for adult entertainment not your normal movies.

She was still a little confused so I put it as blunt as possible without describing it to her.

“Ma’am this is a porn movie award show. The people there are getting awards for being in those type of movies.”

She was shocked and turned beet red, as did I. It felt like I just got done having this talk with my own grandma. The trip was almost done at this point but I was scared that she would keep asking so I simply turned the radio up as I pulled up to the church. I quickly jumped to open her door. As I helped her out she hands me the money and simply said “sorry”, as she quickly shuffles into the church.

I think this ride alone trumps all of the in cab break ups, fights and shady deals as one of the most awkward rides I’ve ever had…

$20 to go…

Posted in Driving Basics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 10, 2011 by HackingVegas

First call of a VERY slow morning was a no go. Normally I get pissed when that happens but this time it turned out to be the best call I’ve had in a while.

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I pull up to this little dive bar in North Las Vegas where I pick up at least ten times a week. They never go far but a ride is a ride. The bartender pokes his head out and asks me to give him a minute and he’ll get the guy out soon. It was slow that morning so I sat and waited.

Soon the door flew open and a guy comes stumbling out. He holds the railing on the walkway heading to the cab. As the rail ends he makes a leap of faith toward the cab and falls up against it. He opens the door and leans in asking in a the most slurred drunken voice I’ve heard in a while, “how much does it cost NOT to go home?” I said, “I don’t know, if you want to give me $10 for wasting my time that would be cool”. He said, “no problem” and reaches in his wallet and started digging for the money. The bartender was standing behind him the whole time and tells him, “NO, you’re cut off. If you think you’re going to stay here you’re paying him $20 or I’m not letting you back in”. The guy got pissed and had a few choice words for the bartender but promptly handed me a $20 bill.

He then told the bartender to take him back in and stop being a jackass.

Off they went and so did I with the meter shorted but my pocket a little fatter. So if anyone is ever wondering how much it costs to not go home, it’s now $20 if you call my cab.

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Irish Rage

Posted in Driving Basics, Drunks, Foreigners with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 27, 2011 by HackingVegas

I pull up to a hotel that has the hottest night club in Vegas and get one guy going to another hotel on the opposite end of the strip. I ask how he’s doing and get a response I didn’t expect. In a heavy Irish accent he says,”I’ll be fine once I kick his ass”. I laugh thinking it may be a joke but after he goes in to the story about this guy stealing his woman, and so on and so forth, I know he’s really going kick ass.

About half way there he hands me a one hundred-dollar bill and asks if I could wait for him . I told him of course, but if he’s not back down in 30 minutes I’m leaving and keeping the change. He assured me that it would only take him about 10 minutes and he was ok with that deal.

As I got closer to the hotel we hit some traffic. He really started to get impatient and asked if he could just jump out and meet me in front when he’s done. I told him he has to let himself out and I’ll meet him wherever. He then wrote my cab number down and off he ran. Like a wild animal I watched him weave in and out of the cars until he found a side door to go in for his hotel.

I kept going until I got to the front of his hotel. I started to tweet about this guy and before I knew it, he was back in my cab.

Sweaty as hell he said, “take me back please”, referring to the club. Once again, I had to laugh. I asked how it went.

He said, “he’s going to think twice before doing this shit again. After kicking his ass I took his room key and tossed him out the room. He’s not on the room so he can’t get back in”.

He laughed his ass off the whole way back to the club.

Big Business Dies

Posted in Random Info with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 23, 2011 by HackingVegas

Cab drivers are called all kinds of things but the last thing I thought we would be called is loyal customers.  Most cabbies I know are looking for the latest and greatest when it comes to places to go. But one place all cabbies can agree on is what convenience store to stop at for all our needs.  What’s the name of this store? I couldn’t tell you if my life depended on it and I’m sure I’m not the only one.  This was the only store that was shown to me on my first day of “training”. I was told, “you can piss anywhere but if you need anything else come here. They’ve got it”. On my first day on my own I had to go in and see what the hell my trainer was talking about and the best way to describe it is WalMart in a broom closet. It had everything from cloths to slots.

I started going there everyday to get my water bottle and news paper.  The staff found out that I was a cabbie and let me know that if there is ever a line just grab what I need and leave the money in the counter. If I need change just wave the bill so they can see it and they will have it ready. JACKPOT!!! I can walk in and out in under 60 sec and not have to wait  the average 5 mins at the 7-11 store up the street. So of course almost every cabbie stops by there.  Over the years about 5 other shops tried to open there and were gone within a year. Even the cafe that called themselves “Taxi Stop” went under. Yes the no name store we all go to even has a kitchen and serves food.

About 6 months ago I noticed that another convenient store was going in, but this one had big money backing it. It was 7-11 going in about 300 feet away. I could tell that the guys at our shop were worried at first but started to change things up.  They expanded their menu of fresh “grab and go” food and made sure that the restroom was always in working order. On the opening day of the 7-11 there were big signs and flags and every grand opening gimic you could imagine. The only thing the 7-11 was missing was the customers.  I think every time I drove by for nearly two weeks the parking lot was empty.  Over time, a few out of state cars were parked over there and a cab or two, but for the most part it still looks like this everyday.  I took this picture about two weeks ago (5 months after opening)

Big Business

Local Business

Hookers And John’s

Posted in Hookers, Law Enforcement, Robberies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 1, 2011 by HackingVegas

I was sitting at a stop light waiting to turn left when my back door opens and someone jumps in.  I look in the rearview mirror and see what looks like the typical Vegas hooker. Before I could say anything she yelled, “GO! I have a few hundred-dollar bills and one’s yours if you just get me out of here”. Before I could do anything, I looked up right as a guy on his phone jumped on to my cab yelling, “NO, STOP! I have the cops on the phone. she just robbed me and they are on their way”.

This is nothing new for cabbies in Vegas. Every night we see hookers running out of hotels while being chased and hear them in the back of our cabs talking about the “last sucker” they rolled while he was showering or just not looking.  Personally, I think it’s funny. I mean if you are desperate enough to get a hooker and dumb enough to think you can trust her, then you deserve everything you get.

While the guy is yelling at me and trying to get me to talk to the cops, I see the hooker desperately trying to get out of my cab with no luck. I keep my child locks on so people can’t just open the door and run or into traffic at the airport. She starts going crazy again and even offers the $200 to just take her away from there.

I tell both of them that I’m not getting involved and that I’m just going to get off the main street and let her out. They can deal with it from there.  So I do just that, and watch as she tries to get into 3 other cabs. I signal for them not to taker her and they just lock their doors. She then runs into the hotel I pulled into so I pull off.  While waiting at the stop light to leave I see the two of them running back across the street. Just then a Las Vegas Metro Police Unit comes flying toward them. The cop stops and gets the hooker into custody.

Before the light could turn green my phone is ringing. It’s my dispatch telling me to stick around because Metro is going to want to talk to me.  I hang up and pull across the street to where they are and my phone rings again. This time It’s Metro’s Dispatch asking me to search my car for a wallet and $200 while I wait for an officer to come over to me.

To make a long story short, nothing was in my cab. I had to write a statement regarding this and they found the $200 under the girls WIG!!! I was laughing my ass of when I saw that.

If you take anything from this I hope it’s that you shouldn’t pick up a hooker. If you still feel that you need to pay for sex, there are legal brothels just outside of town.

Fighting For His M.I.L.F.

Posted in Driving Basics, Drunks with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 22, 2011 by HackingVegas

Security came out with a guy and loaded my next fare. While they were bringing him out he’s yelling, “I just want to fuck that M.I.L.F”. So with that said, here is the fare’s side of the story.

He gets in all pissed off until I ask him, “what the hell did they do to you?”. I had him at that point. He started bragging about everything.

His story:

So I’ve been coming to this hotel for years now and they’ve always taken care of me. For some reason this trip they decided that I was out of line. For what? I don’t know, but I think they’re jealous of my skills with the ladies. I think they are pissed that I was taking all the ladies from the other guests. All weekend I had them hanging on me and wanting to get in my pants. I mean, this is nothing new while I’m here. They should know this. But this week I guess I pissed them off with my newest fan.

The hottest cocktail waitress in the hotel wanted me. I guess she was one of the “big guys” girls but she couldn’t help herself. She brought me drink after drink and came to me more than most waitresses do. She wanted me so bad everyone could see it. So I was sitting at the machine when I decided to make my move. She leaned over me to set my drink down and made sure her tits were right there. I mean, come on. She was asking me to do it. So I turned my chair, wrapped my arms around her and put my face firmly between them. She was acting like she didn’t want me there, but I knew it was just a show for her boss. I told her, “it’s ok, I’ll fuck you”.

Next thing I know I was being taken to the ground by security and thrown out. I tried to explain what she was doing and they didn’t want to hear it. They were just jealous that I was going to score. As they ware walking me out they told me that I was no longer welcome at that hotel and that if I came back I would go to jail. I was pissed. All I wanted was that M.I.L.F. and they couldn’t handle it.

So, when he was done with his little story he asked me if I understood. Could I believe that they would do that crap? I could only say, “here’s your airline”. As I unloaded his bag, he paid me and I completed my talk with, “you fuckin ass wipe. It’s her job. You’re an old man and I doubt your wife even wants you”. Yes he was wearing his wedding ring. I then got in the car before he could say anything back and drove off.

Vegas brings the best out in people.

Do You Listen Before Talking (WTF 4)

Posted in Driving Basics, Law Enforcement, Random Info with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 20, 2011 by HackingVegas

After hanging up on the Taxi Authority in (WTF 3) I went to the coordinator’s office to see what they could or could not give me. Just like before, they knew nothing and couldn’t help me. I then tried to talk to a manager about this. This use to be easy. They use to have their own building and we could just go over there and talk to them. Now they have been moved into the office next to the coordinators office. The door that leads to the new office is behind the desks and has a sign that says something to the effect of “don’t enter without supervisor”. Well, that would be nice if I could get one to act like I’m there.  After trying to get someone to help me and having no luck, I just walked out.  I then walked next door to our human resources office and gave them a shout.

After I filled in the lady at the desk with what is going on, I then asked if she could help me.  I let her know that I was wanting the cops to see the video and was trying to get the information that dispatch had written down for me while I was driving.  She tried to refer me to the same people who blew me off and only cared about the car. She then gave me a number to a guy that will help me in getting the cops to see the video. So I thanked her and walked out to call this guy.

Feeling better because I felt someone was really trying to help, I called the number and got a lady. She says that the guy I was needing to talk to was gone for the day and that she will pass all of my information to him in the morning. He’d get back to me. She said that he works from about 5am to 3pm and before hanging up, she wanted to look to see if the video had uploaded yet. She couldn’t find it but said he uploads them all in the morning and he’ll see it.  I thanked her for helping and hung up. Things were looking up.

I move on to dispatch. I called up and asked to talk to a supervisor. That itself was not an easy task. First I’m told that there isn’t one up there. Then I’m told I’m not allowed to talk to them but that they would take a message and pass it along.  So I call my supervisor and explain who I’m trying to talk to.  Finally after three calls I get transferred to the Dispatch Supervisor.  When he picks up I explain what I’m needing and ask if I can come up and copy it down or if he can read it off to me. For some reason he goes on to let me know that I need to hit my panic button and that will alert my dispatcher that I need help. he goes on to say that I can’t just call for help and I need to follow company policy.

First I told that this had happened about 3 hours prior. So why is he telling me to hit my panic button and deal with my dispatcher? Next, I would hope the guy “supervising” the Dispatchers would know what the radios can and can’t do.  You see a few months ago all of our radios were changed in our cabs and dispatch. Our old radios use to let dispatch know if we hit our panic button.  These new ones don’t. They don’t even tell the dispatch who’s talking to them. Finally, I go back and repeat that this happened 3 HOURS AGO!

I then return to trying to explain to him that I don’t need anyone to help me but him. I ask him again if I can get the information I gave the dispatcher so I can fill out a police report. He proceeded to rant on how everything in dispatch is company property. He explains that if I needed anything I would have to set up a meeting with the CEO of the company. Then, and only then, am I allowed to get anything from dispatch. He then went on to tell me that I better not even think about asking for any video. Those are private property and no one sees those. If I want the cops to see them then I better hope they get a warrant to view them.

So as I’m sure you can figure out I’M PISSED! I asked the guy, ” So if I want to get the information that I provided to my dispatcher regarding an assault that happened against me, I have to set up a meeting with the CEO of the company?  Which means I take time off work and hope that  he allows me to get this info, so then I can go to the police and file a report?” I was seeing red and couldn’t believe the stupidity I was hearing. He had a simple answer for me, YES. I couldn’t take anymore and just hung up.

I have felt helpless as a cabbie before but this was beyond anything I had experienced.  I got into my car and sat there for a few minutes trying to process what had just happened.  This was a company I thought was a good place to work. A company that advertises to have the happiest employees. I’m sure those “happy” employees haven’t had to deal with this stupidity.  I drove home and thought about this all. My only hope was the guy that should be calling me in the morning.

The next day came and went. I never got a call and when I called up to talk to him (4 times), I was told that he was unavailable.  I was all alone in this again. I had to think about what to do. Should I cause a huge uproar at work about this? No, that would just get me fired. Been there, done that. Do I go file a police report without the information I need? No, that’s pointless. So to wrap it all up I just decided to listen to the wife and let it go. I know I’ll get nowhere and if I try to make a deal about it, then I’ll more than likely get fired. Instead, I’m bitching to you guys and moving on hoping someday there will be change.

Thanks for putting up with this. You can look forward to a true Vegas Cab story coming up next time

The Cab Flood of 2011

Posted in Driving Basics, Drunks with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 9, 2011 by HackingVegas

For my twitter follower’s you were there with me when “The Cab Flood of 2011” took place. But now comes the full story.

When I started driving I never knew I would come across the people I have over the years. For example this “crappy” post. That was a new one for me. I use to work in the medical field and my patients had more self-respect than some of my fares. The Fare that was involved in ” The Cab Flood of 2011″ seemed to be an ok guy at first. Oh how looks deceive.

I pick this guy up  from The Cosmopolitan Hotel. He was drunker than a skunk but was able to hold a conversation. The doorman acted as if he knows the guy saying that he knows he good for it, “I see you all the time”. Come to find out this guy is affiliated with The Excalibur Hotel in some form. (I pray as a contractor and not an employee) We talk about the visitors that are in town at the time and how we are looking forward to some of the groups that are coming up.

I take him to his apartment where he pays the fare. I get out to grab his door like I do everyone and he gets out. As he is walking away I notice his ass is wet. Well that’s not uncommon seeing that the pools all just started to open.  I look at the seat and see that it’s wet too and hope that with the heat of the day it will dry before I get to my next fare. This is Standard Operating Procedure for us. Even if it’s still wet we can ask for a single rider until it’s dry. So off I go to my next fare.

I got about a mile down the road when it hit me. I smell something off. I can’t put my finger on it but it doesn’t smell right. I pull to the next light and lean-to the back seat. I take a big sniff and that was all she wrote.  I nearly fell out my cab and walked back to the yard. But I sucked it up, Whined on Twitter and took this Pic.

It’s PEEEEEEE!!! I roll down all four window and crank the A/C. That wasn’t enough so I hung my head out the window.  It was odd. I went about a mile before I smelt it but now that I had I couldn’t smell anything else. I race back to the yard to get a new cab and have them clean the seat.

When I got my cab back they had cleaned the whole cab and even left me an air freshener.  I love our detail show.

Rub and Tug

Posted in Driving Basics, Drunks, Hookers, Random Info with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 6, 2011 by HackingVegas

Las Vegas is known for a lot of things but most of all it’s known as “SIN CITY”. This is a very fitting name considering that you can do nearly anything you can dream of and then some.  As a driver in Vegas we are involved in the transportation of the visitors looking for the Sin part of our city and therefore we are also used for information gathering.  It’s common to get a fare who doesn’t know where they are going until they give you the third degree.  This was the case the other day.

It was just after sunrise and I was sitting at one of my favorite morning hotels hoping for a fare to the Airport.  Out of no where I have a man knocking on my window asking to get in. I notice he doesn’t have the luggage I was hoping for but such is luck. I unlock the doors and off we go. As I pull off I ask where he’s going and that’s where it all starts.

Him: I need a rub down. Where is the best place?

Me: Well are you looking for a good rub down or a GOOD RUB DOWN (Hinting about a parlor)

He then starts in with this long-winded story about how he has been up for about 24 hours and playing cards and just needs to relax. That he has an extra $500 and he’s just trusting me to take him somewhere that will help.

Here’s the problem with that, I’m not the type of driver who will just drive you somewhere if I’m not sure that’s where you want to go. Between the complaints I’ve got from other fares about other drivers doing that and the fact if the guy gets pissed I can get in trouble from the T.A. for not getting a proper destination.

So I pull to the side and start playing 20 questions.  I start with,

This is what a "Real Spa" for massages looks like

Me: are you wanting a true Spa where they are legit and give really good message’s or are you looking for a rub and tug?

Him: Well I’m sore and need relief

Me: Ok well then I would wait for the spa to open at your hotel and go there. With the money you have they will take care of you.

Him: But I need it now. I don’t want to wait. Don’t they have those Asian places you can take me?

This is what a "Rub&Tug" place looks like

I go on to explain that those are really just there for the rub and tug. If he’s really sore they wont be able to help him. Most guys I pick up from those places say the girls hurt them and most say they stop the girl and get to the point.

By now I know that all he really wants it a rub and tug and I’m done playing games.  I turn in my seat and say,

Me: OK let’s stop the shit. You are looking for a hooker and didn’t find one at the hotel you were at. So you jump in my cab and don’t have the balls to say so and spend ten minutes beating around the bush. Now it’s coming up to the time I have to go pick up a personal fare and I need you to figure out what you want or get out. If you want a true message get out and make an appointment at the hotel. If you are looking for a hooker I’ll take you to one of the brothels and you can have at. If you are just looking for someone to pay attention to you and have her tug on you then say so. I don’t have this kind of time. We are in Vegas and I’m a Cabbie. You’re a grown man and I’ve heard it all before so be a man and stop wasting my time.

Him: (in a beaten voice) well, um, just….. (I’m about to kick him out) aaahhhh take me to one of those asian places. Just go to the best one.

I tell him they are all the same but I’m taking him to the one on the way to where my next pick up is. If he needed a ride back he could call me when he’s done and I could pick him back up in about 45 mins. My phone never rang and my day went on.

So for any readers that are coming to Vegas and feel embarrassed about wanting to do something, I have this to say.

If you are afraid to ask for it than maybe you shouldn’t be doing it.  If you want something ask for it and don’t waste everyone’s time. This is Vegas and you know… What Happens in Vegas Stays Dorment Until You Get Home And Need “That Cream”.

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