Permit Renewal (part 1)

It’s that time again, yes its permit renewal time. As a cab driver we have to have a permit to work for a cab company. For the most part this is a bullshit way for, once again, the Taxi Authority to get money out of us. Like I’ve said before, the process of getting a permit is a joke and really needs improvement. But this isn’t about getting the permit, this is about renewing the damn thing.

In order to drive you need a physical that they call a D.O.T. (department of transportation) exam. This consists of a hearing and an eye test, a vital sign check, and all the normal bending, poking, and peeing that most physicals require. The biggest problem is that the three or four I’ve had were never even close to being the same.

The normal place I go to for this physical (a few clinics in town offer cheep DOT’s for Cabbies) was no longer open. So I found another one across town that my company recommended. I made my appointment and headed that way. I had a hard time finding it at first. It was way off the street and didn’t have a sign anywhere. I finally found the numbers on the building that I was looking for and went in.

After signing in and waiting for two other ladies to be seen, the doctor calls me in. There weren’t any nurses working so I had the doctor from start to finish. He starts the exam like any other. It wasn’t until we got to the eye exam part of it all that I started wondering if this guy was for real.

Normally you have an eye chart on a wall and you’re asked to stand at a certain spot and read it. First covering one eye then the other and then with both. Well it was nothing like this. I was asked to read a line off a chart that looks like he made it off of Microsoft Word. The letters were the largest I’ve ever been asked to read and as far as covering your eye, well that must take too long. After reading what seemed like a large print book for my grandma he asked me to sit and hold my arms out. This was followed up by, “no more shaking than the normal person. You’re good to go.”

He then filled out the paperwork, that includes the hearing test section even though he didn’t even have the equipment to test me with. I guess the fact that I was able to hear him was good enough. The last thing he told me was not to take over the counter meds that make me drowsy.

This was the quickest exam I’ve ever had. I think I was in the exam room for no more than 3 minutes. The exam consisted of:

• Blood pressure check (which I don’t think he really did. My blood pressure hasn’t been that low in years)
• Listening to lung sounds (I’m pretty sure of the fact that it was his fingers touching me. I don’t remember his stethoscope leaving his neck)
• Weight (well at least I know I haven’t gained as much weight as I thought. Only 5 pounds in two years.)
• Hernia check (well if you call having me lay back as he touches my stomach and says, “no hernia and the stomach is good”.)
• Eye test (well you know how that went)

This was the dumbest biggest waste of time and money ever. I think out of all the crap we have to do that’s just a money-making scam, this has to be the biggest waste. But the good news is even though I know I need glasses and my blood pressure is actually high, I’ve been given a clean bill of health. Next step is permit renewal and “safety class”. Stay tuned for the next episode of, “Let’s See How Much Money We Can Make From Our Hacks”.